This first list is what I wrote for the Tri Alliance newsletter around May 2010:
1) You would rather spend $100 on a pair of 2XU compression pants than a “3 for $100” shoe sale at Tony Bianco.
2) You chose to run near Beach Road....yes....in public – just so you can perve on bikes that ride along that road
3) You wear your compression pants under Bettina Liano jeans as you did a run session the night before and your muscles are still recovering.
4) On the kitchen bench - the coffee, tea, sugar are replaced with protein powder, recovery powder, isotonic powder.
5) Christmas is when your (online orders) arrives
6) Your hair/skin constantly smells of chlorine - no matter how well you shower after the swim.
7) You run out of towels, always.
8) You constantly have gear in your car – a bike, towels, swimming toys (paddles, fins, pool bouy, goggles, cap), runners, spare socks, running vest, arm warmers...
9) There are plenty of drink bottles in the car and you find yourself drinking (Water/Gatorade) whilst driving all the time.
10) You would (happily) go to sleep at 9pm on a Friday night whilst all your work colleagues are moving on to the next bar/pub as you have a 7am ride on Saturday morning
11) You slow down when you drive past a bike shop and try and look at the latest bike they have at the shop front and go “phwoar!”....then speed up to the legal speed limit as the cars behind you honk their horn...
12) You love gels and we are not talking about hair products
13) You rather wake up at 4:30am to swim 2-3km (in an outdoor pool) before work than being tucked in a warm bed.
14) You are always eating, non-stop
15) You can never finish watching a DVD as you fall asleep after the first 10 minutes, no matter how good the movie is.
16) You see your “squad” friends more than your school/uni/work friends or family
17) You would rather do a “Sweat Session” on a Tuesday night during windtrainer than sweating it up on the dance floor on a Saturday night...maybe because you have an early morning run session planned for Sunday too.
18) A sleep in.....what was that again?
19) You can’t decide between attending a friend’s wedding or entering in a triathlon/running event which falls on the same day!
20) Your “search words” on You Tube are: Ironman, Kona, championships, transition, triathlon...
21) You can never have enough layers which you put on as it is cold, take off as you get too hot when running/riding, put back on when you are stationary.
22) You wear a (Garmin) watch that is too big for your wrist
23) You would rather spend $225 on a RETUL bike fit than paying off your mortgage earlier
24) You laugh to yourself when someone (who doesn’t train with the squad) has a bad technique when they swim, ride or run...because you can recognise a “good technique” and they are doing what you were doing before you joined Tri Alliance.
25) You would rather spend a long weekend training (at Lorne) than spend it with a partner, loved ones or friends...
26) Your water bills sky rockets from the amount of laundry you do and the number of showers you take within a week.
27) Your friends have replaced “What did you do on the weekend?” with “How much did you train on the weekend?”
28) In your lunch break, you visit CBD Cycles and Evelyn Faye rather than Myer or David Jones.
29) You have triathlon/cycling/running magazines next to your couch/bed/toilet
30) You can’t wait until you recover from your cold/flu so you can get back into training again!
I have since added a few things on this list - May 2012
31) You tell your friends dates to put into their calendar of your races and ask them to plan their important dates around them
32) You think you know how to run - this is until you attend a Tony Benson run session.
33) You think you know how to swim - this is until you attend a Coach Ryan swim session.
34) You have more than one bike (says me who has six).
35) Your teeth and guts hate you from the amount of gels and processed energy food products you consume during training and racing
36) You have an excess of competitor/finishers towels, bags and shirts from all the races you have entered.
37) You get to see the sights of greater Melbourne on a bike as part of training, which you never would have before triathlon (in a car).
38) You get helmet hair
39) You can't wait for recovery week to have a sleep in and give your body a chance to recover.
40) You have your goals posted on the fridge door/toiletdoor/car/work computer to remind you why you train so much.
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